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Every Insignificant detail. by ~Gatriel:iconGatriel:

Categories Literature > Poetry > General Poetry > Open


I!
I am a rock
Steady. Rugged. Cold... Strong
And I swear!
If you break me...
Sigh... I swear I'm breaking.
By the trickle of rain.


I'm tripping.
Cause I am not getting the big picture
I'm stumbling cause everything that she does.
Is slowly... crumbling
Every hop and skip on the warm sidewalk. Summer wasn't that long ago
Every Smile, Every gesture...
Every Ins ig ni fi cant detail.
But I swear I'm not getting the big picture.
I know I'm not getting the big picture.
And I!
Am decaying...
From the inside out
Because
Of tiny droplets and stupid little pitter! patters...
I'm falling...
Cause The big picture's
Me and not you
Because it's every
Single.
Tiny.
Insignificant detail that gets me.
Because love,
You...
Are.
     Every.
             In.
                sig.
                     nificant...
Detail

I... I am a rock, and I swear... I sw
I'll slowly crumble...

Because... Because you
Are every insignificant detail
And I...
I am just a silly boy looking through a magnifying glass...
Missing...       the big picture

            You
©2007-2009 ~Gatriel
:icongatriel:

Author's Comments

Well, like always, hardcore critiques pls

Comments


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:iconhallow-oblivion:
~Hallow-Oblivion Jun 22, 2007, 10:12:01 AM
I am to tired to give critique plus you are a better writer than me so it would be kinda bleh? but this poem is wicked as usual man i can feel what you are talking about perfectly
:icongatriel:
~Gatriel Jun 22, 2007, 12:23:19 PM
Thanks bro, submit something sometime eh?

--
Saanka
:iconhallow-oblivion:
~Hallow-Oblivion Jun 22, 2007, 8:19:26 PM
i have been trying to, but dA is evil. i have a few acrostic poems i did for an assignment i tried submitting a long time ago but it wont let me
:iconpetit-chou-fleur:
~petit-chou-fleur Jun 23, 2007, 8:09:23 AM
You always have such a good structure to your poems, using fragmented words so well!
I like the use of the rock metaphor it's really effective. I don't really have any hard critique for you. I really like this one :)

--
Tranquility interrupted by a jealous mind, life overcome by the grief of the ending, celebratory drinks for a lost occasion, a mind full of black, the tainted, dirty white.
Check out my Gallery
:icongatriel:
~Gatriel Jun 23, 2007, 9:45:56 AM
Thank you, i feel good bout this piece

--
Saanka
:iconsorrowfulnightfalls:
~SorrowfulNightfalls Jun 24, 2007, 3:54:01 PM
i like it, particularly the end. me gusta.

--
:frail: Hate all you want, but you can't break the girl who thinks nothing of you. :frail:
:icongatriel:
~Gatriel Jun 24, 2007, 6:16:53 PM
:D was it what you were looking for?

--
Saanka
:iconsorrowfulnightfalls:
~SorrowfulNightfalls Jun 25, 2007, 6:49:19 AM
yes!

--
:frail: Hate all you want, but you can't break the girl who thinks nothing of you. :frail:
:icongatriel:
~Gatriel Jun 25, 2007, 4:23:01 PM
then job all done for me

--
Saanka
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